After a few minutes we reached to the top of the line. When we were just one person away I wanted to turn back and give up, but my cousin kept reminding me and that I had a choice to be brave or be a coward. I chose courage and sat on the rickety kart.
Suddenly the ride started to move ever so slowly. I could feel my stomach churning and my nerves were tingling.Slowly it started to climb the bumpy slope and when we were at the top it suddenly took off at top speed with a loud crash, I could hear my self saying "you made it! " I screamed at the top of my voice hysterically, hoping it would all finish soon.
After it finished I was shocked, I had just gone on my first roller coaster, my cousin patted me on the back saying
" Wow Ramon I'm proud of you, you achieved your goal ".Back at the car I sat and thought to myself, wow that was a real adventure!
Source SodahHead.com
Well done. This is well written and is very detailed. Although you did misuse some words and made some mistakes with the spacing and punctuation. You made it seem as though the reader was also on the ride it was so detailed.
ReplyDeleteI liked the way that you was really detailed and there was a little bit of spacing mistake
ReplyDelete